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Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Iron Eagle Nominee: Israeli Armsdog-Millionaires Assault Bollywood, Good Taste

By Noah Shachtman EmailMarch 09, 2009 | 6:11:00 PMCategories: Bizarro, Iron Eagles, Military Life, Missiles, Sabras, Video Fix

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktQOLO4U5iQ&eurl=http://blog.wired.com/defense/2009/03/iron-eagle-isra.html&feature=player_embeddedLet's say you're a defense-company marketing executive. And you want to make a splash at the Indian defense ministry's annual air show. Do you: (a) buy expensive gifts for New Delhi's generals; (b) treat the press to Kingfishers and samosas; (c) produce a Bollywood-esque video featuring bare-midriff girls, flower-draped missiles, and the catch phrase "dinga dinga dee?"

Unfortunately for us, Israeli arms-maker Rafael chose C. Which means we may have just found the most atrocious defense video of all time, just days into the Iron Eagles — our celebration of the awesomely bad videos of the military-industrial complex. Trust me, Slumdog Millionaire it ain't. Thanks to Stephen Trimble for dredging this up. You bastard.

Every element of the promotional film is just plain wrong. The sari-clad, "Indian" dancers look all too ashkenaz and zaftig. The unshaven, hawk-nosed, leather-clad leading man appears to be a refugee from You Don't Mess With the Zohan. Then of course, there's the implication that the Indian military is somehow like a helpless woman who "need(s) to feel safe and sheltered."

But for my rupees, the worst thing about the video is the damn theme song they've concocted for the thing. To pimp its weapons, Rafael produced a sitar-heavy twist on Rick Astley's love letter to Satan, "Together Forever," complete with a new chorus: "Dinga dinga, dinga dinga, dinga dinga, dinga dinga dee." The rest of us now have to suffer for that bad, bad choice.

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